Farting with the Stars

Yesterday I talked about the problems associated with farting in public restrooms.  My feeling has always been that it's best to be discrete in an effort to keep innocent bystanders from thinking you're weird.  I failed to mention in that blog entry that farts also tend to echo quite loudly in public restrooms, only making things worse.

There are other situations, of course, where it's a lot of fun to put on a show of flatulence.  For example, I always enjoy firing off a few rounds when Little Smoot is around.  Sure, she often pretends that she thinks I'm disgusting, but I know deep down she's impressed.  Farting loudly in front of your kids is right there in the Good Father Manual.  Look it up.

This past weekend I decided that farting in some public situations can be enormously fun, especially if there are celebrities around.  I was lurking on the sidelines of the Steelers game on Sunday, and for the second time this year Taylor Lautner was a guest of the team.

For those of you living underneath really large rocks, Taylor Lautner is most famous for his role as a werewolf in the Twilight movies, and girls swoon to the point of fainting just by merely thinking about him.  There was a girl in the stands on Sunday who was violently weeping because she was within 50 feet of him.  Seriously.

As you can see in the picture, which has not been Photoshopped in any way, shape or form, everyone enjoys a good fart in a football stadium.  As a semi-interesting side note, the girl with Taylor Lautner is Lily Collins, the daughter of singer Phil Collins.  And it is not merely by coincidence that Phil Collins had a hit song called "In the Air Tonight."